2015: Conquering My Biggest Fear

V for Victory! :)

V for Victory! 🙂

I can’t believe, 2015 is almost passed by. I’m counting to 2016.

In 2015, people moved to a new job, got married, and started a family and having kids. Life goes on. And I’m happy that I have overall a good year. And to me, my life during 2015 is more like a “boosting personal experience” rather than public one. I have to bow to myself to be able to explore my own potential – the thing that I never thought long long time ago. Long time ago, my life was set into a goal, like having a good career and ability to impress people with my ability. And dang! My life is too short to do such a thing.

It’s true if I still want to do something good, remarkable thing in professional life. But yeah, I found lots of things in my personal sphere. And this year, I started to prove it. First thing I needed to do is conquering my own fear of height and water.

the magnificent crater

the magnificent crater

Hahaha.. yeah, I fear the two. I know I like flying. But I really hate walking in the high terrain like mountain. Yes, I like hiking. But it’s always something fearful to see what is underneath me. My fear of height stopped me to hike Mt. Zwegabin (725), Myanmar back in February. Its latitude made I breathed really hard. I began to fearful to look down. And yes, I knew the trek in Mt. Zwekabin was hard as well. Because of this fear, I kept put of offering to go to hike Ijen although I really wanted to. Several people have offered me to do it since two years ago. I traveled to Banyuwangi several times, and nope, I still just did not want to go there.

beach at Wedi Ireng.

beach at Wedi Ireng.

And water… I love being at the beach. But I was really afraid of taking a boat trip because I could not swim. I remember my trip to Wedi Ireng beach which ended up with my whole body shaking because I took a trip in a really small fisherman boat. I guess it’s not only that we took a small boat, but also the trip occurred after the dark. I knew, we cruised along the South Ocean – which is well-known for its waves. The 45 minutes trip felt like 4 hours. At that moment, I made a clear decision: I NEED TO TAKE A SWIM LESSON!!! You know, Indonesia is archipelago. If I want to explore my beautiful country, I have to take so many boat trips. Maybe it’s OK if I can’t swim. But I have a little confident. As soon as I got in Surabaya, I gathered information on swimming teachers and lessons. Then, I started my first swimming class on March. And by June, I started to be able to swim with breaststroke. Well, I once almost drowned. I “drank” water so many times. But nothing stopped me to swim. I know really love to swim. If I have, I’d prefer to swim rather than something else. And, everywhere I travel, I always bring my swimming gear. To me, swimming now is not only an exercise, but it’s also a meditative activity. I feel really calm and happy in the water.

a boat trip by using this size of boat made me realised that I need to learn swimming :)

a boat trip by using this size of boat made me realised that I need to learn swimming 🙂

And the height…. I’m EXTREMELY HAPPY to finally made it to hike Mt. Ijen (2,799 meter)!!! I know, it might be my biggest achievement this year!!! Well, the hike to the mountain was not really unplanned. My two friends and I were staying in Blawan Village, Sempol to enjoy little hiking around the area. By the end of our second day, we started to think and wander what if we’d try to hike Ijen. The area is nearby. And based on the information from the hotel security, it’s only 30 minutes by motorcycle to the hiking base in Paltuding. I initially hesitated. But then I felt very intrigued to give it a try. “OK, I know, I’m afraid of height. But I will give it a try. If the trek is steep and unbearable, I would just stop, and go back to the base…” Because our “ambition” was just to hike to the top, we did not want to see the Blue Fire. Although I’d wanted, I did not want to wake up too early to start hike. We just passed the Blue Fire thing, and stick just to hike to the top.

I made it. We made it. At last. And I want to do it AGAIN!!! Hahaha.

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